Conceiving your own child is difficult. Innovative technologies in assisted reproduction explore new alternatives to traditional pregnancy, but legal matters and financial considerations complicate these choices. Educate yourself on the available options that are allowing families to bring a baby into their homes.
The Infertility Answer Book answers your questions regarding the advantages and disadvantages involved with all of the options available, including: • How do find an egg donor? • Will my insurance cover fertility treatments? • What happens in cryopreservation if a parent dies? • What are the risks with using a surrogate? • Should I also be trying adoption? • What laws are involved with insemination? • How do I keep embryo donation private? • When should I discuss my ART choice with my child?
The Infertility Answer Book is your complete guide to the family-building possibilities beyond traditional pregnancy.
Reproductive technology has reached a point where there are many options available to help you become parents. These options have given couples a lot of freedom, opened the doors to wonderful new possibilities, and created many families. When you are considering using reproductive technologies to help you become a family, there are a lot of points to weigh and a lot of information to gather.
Understanding Your Condition
If you are considering assisted reproduction, it is important that you come into the process with a good understanding of why natural conception is not working for you and what conditions or problems have brought you here. Understand what your doctor thinks is realistic for you and your partner and what the odds are for you with the different types of treatment. Many times, doctors cannot give you a complete answer as to why you cannot conceive without assistance, but it is important to arm yourself with whatever knowledge is available.
In general, it is best to try the least-invasive procedures first, if they provide real hope for you. This book talks mainly about fertility treatments that involve input from other people, but many couples are able to conceive using their own genetic material. There are many good treatments that are noninvasive, including drug therapies. Be sure to explore all of the options available to you and understand what could or could not work not before progressing to more invasive and complicated treatments.
What Technology Can Do for You
Technology can help you or your partner become pregnant; provide you with genetic material to create a baby if your body cannot do so itself; or, allow you to work with another woman to gestate your pregnancy. These options can seem staggering. Most people begin at the bottom of the totem pole with the least expensive and invasive options and work their way up to more expensive and complicated procedures.
What Technology Cannot Do for You
While technology can offer you new ways to become parents, it cannot change the basic facts of your circumstance. It cannot help you cope with the emotional effects of being unable to conceive on your own. Technology cannot erase basic biological facts. Technology can provide you with a baby, but it cannot always provide you with a baby that is genetically linked to both you and your partner. This can be a big stumbling block for many couples.
For many couples, it is possible to have a child that is a biological child of one of the parents, while using donor material for the other. This raises the issue of whether you and your partner are comfortable with all this implies—having a child who will resemble one of you but not the other; having a child who has an unknown or unidentified parent; and, the inevitable emotional fallout as you process these facts and live with them in the years to come.
Understanding Terminology
The assisted reproductive field is filled with acronyms for different types of procedures. Following are some definitions of these terms that will be used throughout the book.
ART—assisted reproductive treatment. This is the medical assistance you receive as you try to conceive.
GIFT—gamete intrafallopian transfer. Eggs (either belonging to the intended mother or obtained through donations) are retrieved from the ovaries and placed in the fallopian tubes with sperm. Conception occurs in a natural location, but allows physicians to carefully choose the genetic material available.
Table of Contents
Introduction SECTION I: Assisted Reproduction Chapter 1: Understanding & Evaluating Reproductive Technologies Understanding Your Condition What Technology Can Do for You What Technology Cannot Do for You Understanding Terminology Finding Medical Professionals You are Comfortable With Success Rates Your Right to ART Initial Visit Setting Limits Privacy Your Rights as an ART Patient Weighing Technology vs. Adoption Weighing the Use of Donors Ethical Considerations HIV and Assisted Reproduction Dealing with Risks Fertility Specialist Questionnaire Chapter 2: Coping with ART Deal with Emotions Making Time for ART Keeping Your Relationship Stable Live Your Life Chapter 3: Affording Fertility Treatments Insurance Thinking About Costs Medical Spending Accounts Financing Fertility Taxes Chapter 4: Fertility for Singles Finding Medical Providers Discrimination Considerations Chapter 5: Gay and Lesbian Assisted Reproduction Finding Doctors and Clinics Legal Parents Discrimination Chapter 6: Insemination Laws Types of Sperm Donors Legal Parents Future Considerations Choosing a Sperm Bank Questionnaire Chapter 7: Egg Donation Finding a Donor Donation Process Cost Agreement State Laws Legal Rights Future Contact with the Donor Ovarian Tissue Donation Choosing a Clinic Questionnaire Chapter 8: Embryo Donation Finding a Donor State Laws Costs Agreement Issues Privacy Clinic Evaluation Questionnaire Chapter 9: Surrogacy Laws Concerning Surrogacy The Legal Process of Surrogacy California Procedure Surrogacy Programs Finding a Surrogate on Your Own Surrogacy Agreements Payment Issues Insurance Coverage Problems with Surrogacy Other Steps to Protect Yourself Choosing a Surrogacy Program Questionnaire Chapter 10: Emerging Technologies Nuclear Transfer In Vitro Maturation Cytoplasmic Transfer Cloning Chapter 11: Cryopreservation Contract Cost Divorce Death of a Parent Chapter 12: Raising an ART Child Explaining Things to Your Child Coping with Other People Medical Information Helping Your Child Locate His or Her Donors or Surrogates Chapter 13: Moving from Fertility to Adoption
SECTION II: Adoption Chapter 14: Understanding Adoption Legal Effects Birth Parents’ Rights and Roles Extended Birth Family Legal Process Making the Decision to Adopt Preparing for the Adoption Rollercoaster Preparing for the Future Chapter 15: Adoption Decisions Open vs. Closed Adoption Domestic vs. International Adoption Agency vs. Private Adoption Finding and Choosing an Agency Finding and Choosing an Attorney Facilitators Affording Adoption Agency Evaluation Questionnaire Attorney Evaluation Questionnaire Chapter 16: Adoption Procedures Home Studies Consent No Consent Needed Notice Timing of Consent Consent Procedures Revocation Adoption Court...
About the Author
Brette McWhorter Sember received her JD from the State University of New York at Buffalo and practiced in New York state before leaving her practice to become a writer. She is the author of more than twenty books, including how to Parent with Your Ex: Working Together for Your Child’s Best Interest. She is a member of ASJA (American Society of Journalist and Authors) and AHCJ (Association of Health Care Journalists). She is the recipient of the 1999 Media Award from Family and Home Network (formerly Mothers at Home).
Sember has extensive training in cases involving children and was on the Law Guardian panel in three counties. Her practice included adoptions, which she found to be the happiest cases to take place in Family Court. She is also a trained family mediator and is experienced in a wide variety of family issues. Children have always been her main focus throughout her career.
Sember writes and speaks often about children and family. Her work has appeared in magazines such as ePregnancy, Child, and American Baby. She is the mother of two children and has personal experience with fertility issues.
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The Infertility Answer Book
by Brette McWhorter Sember
